Seriously?!

Basic rule of life #234: It is all but impossible for an adult, especially a male, to look anything but ridiculous when wearing face paint outside of proper context like a sporting event, a costume party, or a carnival where the individual is playing a clown or other jester-like character.

Corollary to #234: in said situation, trying to play it casual, contrary to normal human experience, just makes things worse.

Example:
Driving around downtown Minneapolis today in the drizzle at around 3:30 pm (or, 4.5 hours before game time) I saw a young man crossing the street with facepaint on that ostensibly was meant to make him look ghoulish in character but really made him look quite sad. It was apparent in his body language (slouched shoulders and shifty, downcast eyes, etc.) that the face paint was not his idea. Probably the result of an overbearing mother who, in return for signing the permission slip to get out of 10th grade biology early game day, insisted that he wear the skeleton-Adrian Peterson getup. "If you're planning on going to this Vikings game with this family, young man, you will dress up for it! And don't think you're not going to be a skeleton, even if Halloween is still three weeks away, because I didn't spend $15 at Party City to look at the black and white face paint as it sits on the shelf untouched by a bratty teenage boy who is suddenly "too cool" to apply random face paint as he is paraded around downtown Minneapolis by this mother. Don't think I forgot about your "call me Barbie and I'll call you Ken" phase." [A seething, "you wouldn't dare," face ensues, followed by a slow, reluctant unscrewing of the black paint and a defiantly harsh flip of the vanity mirror switch.] But nonetheless, this example proves that face paint outside of the proper context (and you could really put down a good argument that there is really no "proper" context for face paint on adults) looks simply ridiculous. A related example of this phenomenon of out-of-context absurdity occurs whenever a cyclist abandons his/her bike while still wearing spandex bike gear. Bike + biker = clothes ok (again, the argument could be made that under no circumstances should some people be in form fitting clothes). Biker - bike = clothes NOT ok.